There, I’ve said it: I wanted someone to text all day, and watch TV with.I am skittish about relationships, as most of the marriages I’ve seen up close have been ruinous for one or both parties.
After 10 minutes of this, my neck went out on me, like one of the Three Stooges. I made a few practice casual touches, but he didn’t respond.
But sometimes I am lonely for a partner, a soul mate, a husband. I rarely missed sex: I had tiny boundary issues in all those years of drinking, and by my early 20s I had used up my lifelong allotment. I do love what Wodehouse called the old oompus-boompus when it happens to be in progress, but wouldn’t go out of my way.
Additionally, I have spent approximately 1,736 hours of this one precious life waiting for the man to finish, and pretending that felt good. What I missed was checking in all day with my person, daydreaming about him, and watching TV together at night.
The prophet tells us, “Your old will have visions; your young will dream dreams.” Elderly women in a retirement community in Mill Valley protested the war in Iraq on a busy thoroughfare with placards every Friday for years. But one dream coming true doesn’t mean you give up on other lifelong dreams.
A man I know of 22, halfway to a medical degree, is pursuing ballet dreams in New York City. You’re not dream-greedy to want, say, a cool career and a mate.